Its cold
- Thread starter cany
- Start date
God’s take on Lawn Care
God to Saint Francis: Frank, you know all about gardens and nature. What in the world is going on down there on the planet? What happened to the dandelions, violets, milkweeds and stuff I started eons ago? I had a perfect no-maintenance garden plan. Those plants grow in any type of soil, withstand drought and multiply with abandon. The nectar from the long-lasting blossoms attracts butterflies, honey bees and flocks of songbirds. I expected to see a vast garden of colors by now. But all I see are these green rectangles.
Saint Francis: It's the tribes that settled there, Lord. The Suburbanites. They started calling your flowers 'weeds' and went to great lengths to kill them and replace them with grass.
God: Grass? But, it's so boring. It's not colorful. It doesn't attract butterflies, birds and bees; only grubs and sod worms. It's sensitive to temperatures. Do these Suburbanites really want all that grass growing there?
Saint Francis: Apparently so, Lord. They go to great pains to grow it and keep it green. They begin each spring by fertilizing grass and poisoning any other plant that crops up in the lawn.
God: The spring rains and warm weather probably make grass grow really fast. That must make the Suburbanites happy.
Saint Francis: Apparently not, Lord. As soon as it grows a little, they cut it — sometimes twice a week.
God: They cut it? Do they then bale it like hay?
Saint Francis: Not exactly, Lord. Most of them rake it up and put it in bags.
God: They bag it? Why? Is it a cash crop? Do they sell it?
Saint Francis: No, Sir, just the opposite. They pay to throw it away.
God: Now, let me get this straight. They fertilize grass so it will grow. And, when it does grow, they cut it off and pay to throw it away?
Saint Francis: Yes, Sir.
God: These Suburbanites must be relieved in the summer when we cut back on the rain and turn up the heat. That surely slows the growth and saves them a lot of work.
Saint Francis: You aren't going to believe this, Lord. When the grass stops growing so fast, they drag out hoses and pay more money to water it, so they can continue to mow it and pay to get rid of it.
God: What nonsense. At least they kept some of the trees. That was a sheer stroke of genius if I do say so myself. The trees grow leaves in the spring to provide beauty and shade in the summer. In the autumn, they fall to the ground and form a natural blanket to keep moisture in the soil and protect the trees and bushes. It's a natural cycle of life.
Saint Francis: You better sit down, Lord. The Suburbanites have drawn a new circle. As soon as the leaves fall, they rake them into great piles and pay to have them hauled away.
God: No!? What do they do to protect the shrub and tree roots in the winter to keep the soil moist and loose?
Saint Francis: After throwing away the leaves, they go out and buy something they call mulch. They haul it home and spread it around in place of the leaves.
God: And where do they get this mulch?
Saint Francis: They cut down trees and grind them up to make the mulch.
God: Enough! I don't want to think about this anymore. St. Catherine, you're in charge of the arts. What movie have you scheduled for us tonight?
Saint Francis: 'Dumb and Dumber,’ Lord. It's a story about...
God: Never mind, I think I just heard the whole story from St. Francis.
Chinacat
Well-Known Angler
Same here
8 ?
Why are you apologizing? Rumor has it FL will be dipping down into the 30s this week...sorry nyangler friends,,,,,62* now,, partly cloudy,, today maybe a few showers high 73* low tonite 61*,,,,,,not too bad,,,,,,,><)))):>
><)))):>
I ain't complaining, it's a beautiful sunny day. The cold is nothing a base layer and my heavy coat won't cure for the morning walk. AND, it means the snow we're going to get will be sticking for fun and play on Sunday!!
Of course, there's the GD 40°F forecast on Wednesday which has me pissed off...
I was in Florida for that cold spell and only had t-shirts and shortsroccus your right over here it will get down in the low 30s ?,,, coldest its been since 2018 mite have too drap blankets over the live plants? glad we have none,, only fake flowers for now
,,,not sorry then ?
><)))):>
LL Bean - so Maine lol
pequa ill call bassmaster on this 
,,,,,,,,,,,im on the ball
,,as of now,,,,,,pequa are these the dates you are looking for,, mite change a bit,,,,monday .jan31st sunny 65* low 46*,,,feb1st 72* sunny low56*,,feb 2nd 80* cloudy low 61* feb 3rd cloudy 82* low 61* fri feb 4th cloudy 82* low 60* sat feb5 sunny 70* low 51* pequa no rain all week ,,,,,,,,,, sunday dont know yet,,,,,,,,,,,,,,><)))):>
><))):>
,,,,,,,,,,,im on the ball,,as of now,,,,,,pequa are these the dates you are looking for,, mite change a bit,,,,monday .jan31st sunny 65* low 46*,,,feb1st 72* sunny low56*,,feb 2nd 80* cloudy low 61* feb 3rd cloudy 82* low 61* fri feb 4th cloudy 82* low 60* sat feb5 sunny 70* low 51* pequa no rain all week ,,,,,,,,,, sunday dont know yet,,,,,,,,,,,,,,><)))):>><))):>
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LL Bean OUTLET Store!! Back in the days of lifetime returns for any reason, it was a treasure trove on great deals. I think that unit was priced at $45 in the catalog, but I got it for $5.
Some of my better deals there were returned, new Thule products, like a $800 Hullavater for $300 and a $800 Easy Fold Bike Rack for $350!! I picked up these 2 steals on 2 sequential trips down to Freeport!
Then there was the Bean Kennebec 7' fishing rod that was a perfect rod for my 3/4 oz Striper Strikes. They were $100 in the catalog, but I've picked them up after they stopped selling them from $15 - $30 dollars. Now I end up spending $170 on St. Croix rods. The have little spinning gear there, but tons of fly rods and deals like Scientific Angler 9 wt, shooting head floating saltwater fly line for $15!!
Over the past few years with the advent of no-hassle returns, there's been few "scores" down there. I usually just pick up the odd shirt or a canvas bag with a misspelled monogram for groceries...
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